Ever have bad dreams as a kid? The kind that you wish you could wake up from but are never able to...... I hate those kind of dreams. You always end up waking up disoriented and freaked out. At least you would if you were me........
It seems really silly admitting this, but I had one of those types of dreams last night. I obviously know it freaked the hell out of me, the only problem is that I don't remember what it was that did the freaking. By the time I fully woke up I forgot what had happened. That alone is frustrating, I wish I knew what it was that scared the crap out of me so badly.
Having nights like that kind of puts a damper on things to. Because of last night, I woke up in a really bad mood. I've just been in this funk all morning that I can't seem to shake off. The looming "joy" of working for about 8 hours every night for the next two nights doesn't make it much better either. The fact that I'm going to have a nice loooooooooong shift at work makes me more stressed out then anything.
I know I said yesterday that I freak out to much and need to relax more. It is still true, I'm just having a bit of a hard time figuring out how I'm supposed to do that right now. It is kind of hard to relax in a crazy house where everyone always seems to be going somewhere and no one is able to talk when you need to.
I mean, maybe if I was able to just sit down and talk to someone in my family about all the crap that was bothering me then maybe I would be even the slightest bit happier. But then again knowing my luck, I would just get yelled at or criticized for what ever it was that I wanted to talk about. I seem to get very little to no encouragement or support for any of the things I want to do with my life.
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I did get my first comment in a long time yesterday......that made me a bit happier
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